Expected
by Ms. Perception
Summary: Wherein Clint gets the Spanish flu, Natasha learns that antibiotics and birth control really don't mix, Bruce is over this crap already and Thor is a secret Mario Kart master. AKA the obligatory Avengers baby fic that I apparently really needed to write.
1. Natasha and Clint Sitting in a Tree…

**Summary:** Wherein Clint gets the Spanish flu, Natasha learns that antibiotics and birth control really don't mix, Bruce is over this crap already and Thor is a secret Mario Kart master. AKA the obligatory Avengers baby fic that I apparently really needed to write.

**Pairings:** Clintasha and background Peppernony

**Warnings:** Just general spoilers for the movie and _Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D_. Also a warning for pregnant stereotypes and abuse of perfectly good marshmallows.

**Disclaimer:** If I owned anything having to with the _Avengers_ I would be a rich, happy woman. Instead I am a broke, happy woman. I also do not own FRIENDS or anything related to that. But I did borrow a gag from that show. Sorry not sorry!

**Author's Note:** It's the obligatory 'Natasha is pregnant' story I didn't think I wanted to write but apparently I did because it would not leave me alone while I was trying to write the billion other stories I'm supposed to be working on. This doesn't fit in with any of my other existing _Avengers_ stories even though some elements might repeat through this story. I hope you enjoy.

* * *

**Natasha and Clint Sitting in a Tree….**

It all started when Clint caught a cold. Okay, so it wasn't exactly a cold. It was actually a mutated strain of the Spanish flu that HYRDA was using for some stupid reason. Natasha kind of tuned out the usual megalomaniacal babble when they hit her partner in the face with a bio bomb carrying the mutated strain. Naturally because Clint was by far the most danger prone individual she ever had the horror of meeting, he was immediately beset with the symptoms leaving her to save the day. As usual. He made it up to her by turning to her and vomiting all over her new boots. And from that brief exposure she ended up sick too. When they were deemed too "gross" to stay on base, the pair of spies were sent packing back to the Avengers Tower where they proceeded to infect every member of the team save for Bruce and Thor. A few rounds of antibiotics had them all feeling better within a week. But Bruce kept them on a lower dose of the antibiotics due to Clint still being a drippy, sniffling hot mess. The little outbreak monkey was hit harder than all of them and took the longest getting better. But gradually he got better and soon they were all able to put the whole incident behind them.

Or rather, Natasha wanted to put the whole incident behind her but it appeared that she wasn't quite as over the flu as she thought she was. Because for some reason she was still feeling some of the symptoms nearly two month later. At first she was willing to overlook it. It was just a vague nausea every now and then. A couple of bouts of dizziness. Nothing she couldn't handle on her own. It wasn't until she and the rest of the team were in the middle of a fight against the masked super powered villain of the week that it became a problem. That's when right in the middle of watching her partner's back, she experienced a dizzy spell so severe she almost fainted. She, Natasha Romanoff, the goddamn Black Widow, almost fainted! She likes to think that it's because she was all of the above mentioned things that she didn't actually faint but all of that was a moot because during her moment of weakness, Clint was shot in the shoulder. Whatever this lingering sickness was needed to go. She couldn't do her job (keeping Clint alive because he certainly wasn't interested in doing it) if she was getting dizzy and nauseous all the time.

And that's what led her to Bruce's lab a few days after that incident. Clint was, of course, fine. It was a through and through wound, which is the scheme of Clint like injuries really was like a scratch. Within a day the fool was back to climbing through vents and in general making them question who was the real spider out of the two of them. But Natasha was spooked. She was concerned. Because they got lucky that it was just a through and through this time. And it was Clint. It could've been much worse. She's actually surprised it wasn't. Clint attracted trouble and it was her responsibility to keep him alive. So she needed to be at the top of her game. Clint was the only constant in her life before she met the rest of the Avengers. He was the one that made her life worth living. Before she met him, she was just existing. A puppet slave to the Red Room until he cut her strings and freed her. He gave her a life worth living. And she would be damned if he died on her watch.

"So that's the gist of it," Natasha said, shifting around on the makeshift exam table Bruce told her to sit on. "I've been feeling dizzy and occasionally nauseous. Well, it started off as just nauseous and escalated into me actually throwing up."

Bruce remained silent staring at her with some unreadable emotion on his face. He cleared his throat. "Uh, are you feeling more tired than usual?"

"Actually," Natasha chewed on her lip. "I took a nap yesterday. I haven't done that in years."

"Oh, um, what about smells and food? Any aversions to smells or foods that you may have previously enjoyed?"

"Now that you mention it, I had this really weird reaction to the eggs Steve was making yesterday."

"And by weird, you mean?"

"I mean that they smelled incredibly disgusting and I may have tossed them out the window while he was still cooking," Natasha replied, sheepishly. "In retrospect, that was a really bad way of handling the situation. But they just smelled so bad. And I usually like eggs. Clint is the one that doesn't."

"When was your last menstruation?"

"About two months ago. But that's not that weird. I'm on birth control. It regulates that….. Bruce, why do you look like you're about to Hulk out? What's wrong?"

Bruce held up a hand as he worked to slow his breathing down. Natasha replayed the whole conversation in her head. She had no idea what she said that could make him angry. Although he didn't look angry, so much as faintly panicked. Now she was concerned.

"Bruce, what the hell is wrong with me?!"

"I don't want you to panic. Or even take this as what's actually happening but the thing is…. Antibiotics have a tendency to interfere with birth control."

Natasha stared at him. "Interfere?"

"Um, the thing is, that sometimes birth control is not a hundred percent effective at preventing pregnancy when the person is taking antibiotics. Like you were… about two months ago."

Natasha blinked. "Bruce, are you trying to imply that…"

"Nat, I think you might be…. You know."

"No! Nope, you're not finishing that sentence. Nope. Don't do it!"

She leapt off the exam table and immediately started to pace. Had she been in her right state of mind, she would've laughed at the way Bruce scrambled up to get away from her. But she wasn't in the right state of mind. She was in the "oh my god, I might be pregnant" state of mind. Because pregnancy was never something she thought of. It wasn't something she even remotely considered. She was placed on birth control the day she got her first period. The Red Room did not take chances. That was the one principle from the Red Room that she carried with her. She stayed on the birth control even in SHIELD. Even while being in a committed relationship with one individual. Because one time of carelessness would be all it took. So she was on the pill. And she took it for granted that occasionally she could be reckless. Occasionally she could throw caution to the wind… except apparently she couldn't because….

"Get me a test!"

"Natasha, I could just run a blood test right now and confirm it for you."

"No, I don't want you or your stupid machines coming anywhere near me!" she knew she was being irrational but as far as she was concerned this was Bruce's fault. Bruce and his stupid antibiotics. His stupid birth control interrupting antibiotics.

He opened his mouth to say something but she had him backed against a wall before he could finish the sentence. "If the next words out of your mouth are not, 'of course I will, Natasha. Would you like some chocolate while I'm out' I swear I will kill you faster than the Other Guy can come out."

Bruce gulped. "Of course, I will, Natasha. Would you like some chocolate while I'm out?"

She let him go, smoothing out his shirt in the process and smiled as brightly as she could manage. "Thanks, Bruce. I actually would. Could you get me those chocolate covered marshmallow cake things they sell at the bakery on the corner?"

"You hate marshmallows."

"Did I ask for your opinion on my eating habits? I did hate marshmallows but now they sound delicious. I just want some marshmallows. I don't understand why you're making such a huge deal out of this. This is whole situation is your fault anyway. You asked me if I wanted something and I told you I did. I just want marshmallows!"

"It's okay. It's okay. You're right. I'm really sorry, Nat," Bruce said, his voice soothing like he was talking to a skittish animal. Natasha caught a glimpse of her reflection in one of the shiny metal cabinets. She was pale with wild red hair and watery green eyes. Maybe Bruce wasn't that far off. She cleared her throat and stepped away from the terrified looking scientist.

"I'm sorry," she tried to smile. Judging by the look in his eyes, she only came off as slightly less psychotic. "I didn't mean to yell. If you could please get me a pregnancy test so we can prove that I'm not pregnant and am instead just really sick that would be great."

"Sure, Nat. Whatever you want." Bruce quickly walked over to his desk, retrieved his wallet and jacket and started to leave.

"Oh, and Bruce? Could you also make sure you bring back some hot sauce? I really need some hot sauce right now." Bruce paused giving her that look again. He opened his mouth to say something but finally nodded, spun on his heels and power walked as fast as he could out the door. She shrugged at his odd response and sat down on the exam table to wait.

* * *

"Where's the fire, Brucey?" Tony called as their other resident genius came barreling out of his lab like the hounds of hell were on his feet. Clint paused the game he and Tony were playing to look and see if there were actual hounds chasing after him. He's learned a long time ago that living with the Avengers tended to make things that normally should be impossible all too possible. But there were no hounds of hell chasing Bruce. This time. But he didn't stop to talk to his friends either. He just kept going until he was in the elevator.

"I wonder what that was about," Steve said looking between the elevator and the lab as if he could puzzle it all together. Clint would've commented on that but Tony chose that moment to lean over and press the button on his controller that would un-pause the game.

"Oh, you cheating bastard!" Clint hissed. Bruce's strange behavior went completely forgotten as he concentrated on the game. Mario Kart was serious business.

Twenty minutes later they were bored and slightly pissed that the alien god that barely could manage the task of making toast without turning it into a spectacle just kicked both their asses at Mario Kart. So when Bruce came back, looking no less harassed than when he left, Tony took the opportunity to pounce on his friend. He was once again ignored. They all watched as Bruce stalked straight past them and right back into his lab.

"JARVIS, show me Bruce's lab."

"_Sir, Dr. Banner has requested that all surveillance be turned off for the interim." _

"Well ignore his request and listen to me," Tony rolled his eyes.

"_I would, sir, but Agent Romanoff has threatened to, and this is a direct quote, 'shoot that nosey bastard Tony in the balls if he tries to override this'. If you will not think of the safety of your balls, sir. Then think about the consequences for poor Ms. Potts_."

"Did Tony really just have a conversation with an artificial intelligence about his genitals?" Steve asked, wrinkling his nose. Tony shrugged and blew him a kiss. Steve rolled his eyes and went back to his drawing.

Clint snorted but was secretly growing concerned. Natasha could be dangerous but she wouldn't actually hurt any of her friends. She definitely wouldn't threaten to shoot them in the balls. What the hell were they doing in the lab anyway? He didn't even know Natasha was in there. Now he was getting even more worried. He furrowed his brow before glancing up at the ceiling. The vent from the living room ran straight into the lab. He could just take a quick peek and Natasha didn't even need to know. Tony's balls would remain intact. It was a perfect plan. And he would remind himself of that after he recovered from blacking out (fainting made him sound like a delicate little flower and he totally was not) and the six words that would change his life forever.

* * *

Bruce knew that by moving into the Tower his life was going to change. He went from being on the run to having a safe place to live. He went from being alone to having what could arguably pass as a family. He went from being the weirdest thing he knew to living with the impossibly weird (Clint, Pietro and Tony especially). So really he thought he was prepared for anything. But nothing could prepare him for sitting next to a slowly mentally and emotionally deteriorating assassin who was currently eating a chocolate covered marshmallow cake smothered in hot sauce and staring at several pieces of plastic that said assassin just peed on.

"Did you have to get the ones that took the longest?" Natasha asked around a bite of her ungodly creation. He really hoped that she was pregnant because otherwise there was something seriously wrong with her. Natasha hated marshmallows. She also wasn't overly excited about spicy things. But here she was downing sirracha drenched chocolate covered marshmallows like her life depended on it. "Seriously, this is taking forever."

"First, it's been less than a minute. Second, you know what would've been faster? A blood test. And it definitely would be more accurate than this!"

"Screw you, Banner. This whole situation is your fault anyway. You and your stupid antibiotics that tasted like chalk and ass!"

"Do I even want to know why you know what ass tastes like?"

"I despise you."

"And we don't even know for sure if you are…. You know. You're jumping to conclusions!"

"Well if I am, you know, then it's your fault!"

Bruce raised an eyebrow, leaning forward on his elbows somewhat. "If you really are… you know then wouldn't it be the father's fault?" he paused as a niggling thought occurred to him.

They all just assumed that their two assassins were together. And Clint and Natasha never seemed to be in a rush to correct them or change their minds. Or rather Clint wasn't. While he never confirmed or denied their relationship, he was obviously smitten with his partner. Natasha just glared at them anytime one of them worked up the courage to ask about the agent's relationship. What if they weren't really dating? What if Clint was in love with Natasha but not the other way around? What if she was having someone else's baby? Clint would be devastated.

"Why do you have that thinking too much about something really stupid look on your face right now?"

"Why do you even know what would look like?"

"I look at Tony every day. Guaranteed you see that facial expression on his face at least three times a week." Bruce shrugged. She had a point. "So what are you thinking about?"

"It's just that…. Clint is the father of the hypothetical and not actually confirmed baby, right?"

Natasha gaped at him, mouth full of chocolate and marshmallow. She snapped her mouth closed and swallowed angrily. He didn't know how someone could manage to pull of swallowing angrily but Natasha was nothing if not a master at the improbable.

"Are you freaking kidding me right now? Of course, Clint is the father!"

They both jumped at sudden thump over their heads. Before either could question it, Tony's voice sounded over the building's PA system.

"_Uh, so two things. One, we know what you're up to in there. And two, does someone want to go get Clint out of the vents? He either just died or fainted. Either way we should probably clear him out before he starts to rot_."

"Goddammit!"

* * *

Ten minutes later, the six original Avengers were assembled in the lab. Natasha was sitting with her legs folded and Clint half-conscious on her lap. She was using that as an excuse not to get up and check on the tests. They were done five minutes ago but she couldn't do it. She couldn't check. And it seemed that the others felt the exact way as they were all crowded together staring at the tests from as far away as they could get while still staying in the same room.

"We would have to give up SHIELD," Clint murmured. Natasha looked down to meet his dazed blue eyes. She raised an eyebrow. "If we had a kid, we'd have to give up SHIELD. That's not the type of place you want to raise a kid."

"Maybe we wouldn't. I mean there are other roles that we could play in the agency that aren't as dangerous. I'm sure the Director would accommodate that transition," Natasha argued, albeit weakly. She really didn't want to give up field work. Then again, she didn't want to give up SHIELD period. Another thought occurred to her. "We would probably have to quit being Avengers."

"There's no telling what kind of super powered freak show would try to use our kid as bait," Clint agreed. "I mean it's not that I never thought about this but it's a really bad time."

"Yeah, it's terrible…. Wait, what do you mean you've thought about this? You've thought about having kids… with me?"

"Of course," Clint blinked, sitting up straight. "Haven't you?"

"No! I'm the Black Widow! What the hell am I supposed to do with a baby?!"

"Raise it to be an awesome badass ninja assassin like its parents?"

"So you want to have a baby? Now?"

Clint chewed on his lip. "I don't know. What about you?"

"What about me?"

"Well, you would be doing pretty much all of the work here. What are you feeling about this?"

"I," Natasha trailed. She actually had no idea how she was feeling. Truthfully she never thought about being a mother until that very moment. It was a confusing concept and she really hated that she was being put on the spot like this.

She also really hated that she was too terrified to walk literally four feet to find out whether their whole lives were going to change for better or for worse. Because even if by some miracle she wasn't pregnant, the idea was out there now. Now she was going to be thinking about it. Obsessing about it. And it was ultimately going to drive her and Clint apart because they weren't going to be on the same page about it. Ever. Because important thing to note: She was the Black Widow! She didn't know the first thing about raising a kid.

"Okay, this is ridiculous," Tony announced, pushing up from his seat and crossing over to the table where the five tests Bruce bought were collected. He moved from each test, noting the results and nodding. Finally he turned around to face the anxious group. He shrugged. "You're good."

"What does that even mean? What did the tests say, Tony?!"

"You're not pregnant. Hurray!"

Natasha didn't quite know what to make of the intense feeling of emptiness and sadness that coursed through her body at that one moment. Against her will, her hand rose to rest on her flat stomach. She should be elated. She wasn't pregnant. She was in the clear. She could walk out of here and completely forget the whole motherhood thing. She could shove the idea of being pregnant out the door. The idea of raising a child that had Clint's eyes and smile would be banished from this point on. Because she wasn't pregnant. And she wasn't likely to get pregnant any time soon.

"Guys? Did you hear me?"

"Yeah," Clint mumbled. "That's, uh, that's great."

"Mmm hmm, yeah, that's awesome," Natasha added with clearly faked enthusiasm.

"Well if it's great and awesome, why do you two look so disappointed?" Steve asked, crossing his arms over his chest. "I thought that's what you wanted. Now you don't have to change anything in your lives. You don't have to quit the Avengers or SHIELD. Not that you would've needed to quit if you were actually pregnant. You know that we would help out the best we could."

"I know, it's just that I didn't want... I'm happy about this, it's just that…." Natasha trailed off again. She looked to Clint whose eyes reflected her own chaotic emotions. He gave her a weak smile that she tried to return. It didn't work.

"We really are happy. It's just that I think we were both starting to adjust to the idea a little bit. Like it didn't suddenly seem like the worst thing in the world. And now… it's just a little bit of a letdown I guess." Natasha nodded, wordlessly taking his hand in hers. Their fingers interlaced naturally as they both secretly lamented the idea of child they had only just decided they wanted.

Tony grinned, clapping his hands together. "Well that's awesome news. Because I totally lied."

"What the hell?"

"I lied," Tony repeated as if that were something to be proud of. Then again it was Tony. "Natasha is pregnant. Five out of five tests agree. You're definitely having a baby."

"You lied?!" Natasha, Bruce and Clint yelled in unison.

"You stole that concept from _FRIENDS_," Thor accused bringing the pending berating to a screeching halt. Five sets of eyes stared at the Asgardian in bewilderment.

"Why do you know that?"

"I binge watched the whole series last summer with Darcy and Jane."

Steve looked like he wanted to comment on that but fortunately chose to return to the issue at hand which was that Tony Stark was a huge, freaking lying liar that lied! Steve gave his best disappointed in you and your life choices face. "Tony, that was taking an incredible risk."

"No it wasn't. We all know Clint and Natasha. They're quite clear on the things they do and do not want around. Remember your eggs, Steve. She tossed them out the window. If they really didn't want this baby then they would've said so. But the fact that they were hesitant and actually talking about the things that would need to change proved that they did."

"And if you were wrong?"

Tony shrugged again. "Well then at least the kid would know I will always love him or her even if his or her parents do not."

"Tony, you find new ways every day to become a bigger asshole," Bruce said with a bemused look on his face. It was the same look you gave your favorite furry friend when they do something incredibly stupid but were so adorable that you didn't have the heart to tell at them. It was the look that said 'I love you but you do really dumb things and sometimes eat my slippers'.

"Wait, you know what this means?" Steve asked excitedly.

"Clint and Natasha are about to birth a possible weapon of mass destruction? Or their own version of a super spy?"

Steve paused. "Actually, that too. But no, baby means that we get to be uncles! And I'm calling dibs on godfather before that jerk Bucky get sback and tries to pull Russian/sniper allegiance."

"Why do you get to be the godfather?! It should clearly be me!"

"No way, I'm totally going to be the godfather."

Natasha watched as the four idiots dissolved into their usual state of bickering. She could tell they were genuinely happy about this. And their joy was kind of infectious. For the first time since Bruce told her she could possibly be pregnant, Natasha was starting to feel a little excited as well. Or rather she would when she knew how Clint felt about this. For once she couldn't read his eyes. She always knew what he was thinking or feeling by looking in his eyes. But this time she got nothing.

She tugged on the hand still wrapped in hers, pulling him away from the impromptu celebration that had already dissolved into an argument over who would be the favorite uncle. She didn't stop walking until they were a good distance away from the lab. She placed her free hand on his face, stroking his cheek with her thumb.

"Talk to me, Clint? Please? I need to know how you're really feeling about this. Because this? This is the scariest thing we've ever done but I think we can do it. Together. I think we can but I need…."

She was cut off by two warm and very inviting lips crashing against hers. She let out an involuntary yelp as an arm wrapped around her waist lifting her in the air briefly. She could feel him smiling against her lips and she giggled in response.

"So I take it you're okay with this?"

Now it was Clint's turn to cup her face gently between his hands. "Are you kidding me? This is awesome! I'm nervous as hell but I'm having a baby with the most amazing and beautiful woman I know. What's not to love about this?"

She felt her eyes water and cursed her fluctuating hormones. "You still going to think I'm beautiful and amazing when I'm a fat, hormonal mess eating really weird gross things?"

"Of course," Clint shrugged. And she believed him. "Natasha Romanoff, will you raise a badass ninja baby with me?"

She beamed up at him. "I will. And will you, Clint Barton, raise a badass ninja baby with me?"

"I will. I will also promise to follow up on all your crazy cravings and not judge you for them. Even though seriously sirracha, chocolate and marshmallows?" Clint pulled a face. "It tasted gross kissing you. I can't imagine what it tasted like going down."

"It tasted like heaven," she corrected him with a glare. He gave her a cheeky grin which prompted her to pull him into another, deeper kiss. "See? It's delicious."

"It's something," Clint conceded. "But if it's what you and the little spider monkey want, then it's what you shall have."

"Spider monkey?"

Clint shrugged. "Aren't kids supposed to have cute nicknames or something?"

Natasha stared at him blankly. She wondered how exactly they were supposed to pull this one off. Neither of them had would could even pass as a functional childhood. How were they supposed to raise a child? And then she looked up at him and smiled. They were going to do this the same way they did everything: together and with a lot of improvising.

"I have to tell Phil."

Natasha frowned. "You're going to the cemetery, aren't you?"

"Of course."

"Clint, it's been three years. I'm really going to need you to stop going to Phil's grave every time you need to tell him something."

"No, I don't think I can. You coming with?"

"Definitely no. I think I've had my fill of seeing Coulson's grave. Enjoy your bonding time with Phil. I'll catch up with him next time."

"As you wish. Text me your gross baby craving food and I'll pick it up while I'm out."

She gave him the finger even as he grinned and walked out the door. Natasha huffed, placing a hand on her stomach. "Don't grow up to be like your dad, okay? Please, please, please get your brains from me." She paused as she realized that she was talking to her unborn child. The action was so natural and it felt… right. She smiled softly.

She kept her hand on her stomach as she drifted back to the lab to tell the others to shut up already and to finish off her cake. She didn't care what they said. Her cake was awesome. Although now that she thought about it. It was missing something. But what?

"Oh, pickles!"

* * *

Clint took a deep breath as he sat down in front of Coulson's grave. It took him a lot of time before he could face it. It took him a full year before he could even come out to the cemetery and take a look at the grave much less actually approach it. The guilt he felt about his actions during the invasion still lingered to this day. Three years, a lot of professional counseling and a lot of not so professional counseling and Clint could admit that he wasn't solely responsible for everything that happened. He could also finally admit to himself that he wasn't responsible for Phil's death. And with that realization, it was easier to face the grace.

"Phil, long time no see," he started, lying down on the soft grass. "Where do I even begin?"

"Begin with why you still feel the need to make me come out here when I have a perfectly good office that we could be using right now."

Clint rolled his head to the side in time to see the current director of SHIELD settling down next to him. He smiled lazily up at the older man. "Hello, Director Coulson."

"Hello, Agent Pain in My Ass," Phil returned with a smirk. "When are you going to stop coming out here? You know I'm not actually dead."

"Well I didn't know that until fairly recently, Director," Clint reminded him. "And by then I was in a bit of a routine if you will."

"You're also slightly insane and a little shit."

"Is this Director Coulson talking or Phil?"

"Strangely, without all the Tahiti aftereffects, I am feeling more Phil than I have in years. They both agree with that assessment." Clint snorted. He lifted his hand in the air and stared at the fingers. "So you want to tell me what's going on?"

"You know about my thing with my dad, right?"

Clint could feel Phil looking down at him. He continued to stare at his hand like it was the most fascinating thing in the world. Phil sighed, leaning back on his elbows.

"Yeah, of course."

"Do you think I'm anything like him?"

"No, if I did, I wouldn't let you near any of my nieces, now would I? You want to tell me what this is actually about?"

"Um, Nat is…. Nat is pregnant." Clint looked up at Phil. "It's mine before you ask."

"I don't need to ask. Of course the baby would be yours." Phil tilted his head to the side. "I assume since you're telling me that you're keeping this child."

"Dude," Clint lowered his hand to glare up at Phil. "That was never an option."

"Of course not."

"The thing is that Nat is getting kind of excited about it now. And Tony, Steve, Bruce and Thor are already battling to see which one of them gets to challenge Bucky to rights as favorite uncle of the year. So they're pumped. I know once the twins, Lang and Sam hear about it, they're going to be just as psyched. And I want to be excited to. I really do. Because this is everything I could ever want. But I just…."

"You're wondering if you're going to screw it up. If you're going to be anything like your father. And I'm wondering when you decided to make a turn into stupid."

Clint sat up straight and glared at his mentor. At the man that brought him into SHIELD and gave him a chance at a better. The man that practically raised him from a juvenile delinquent barely out of his teen years to the man he was today. To the man about to have a baby with the woman he knew he was going to spend the rest of his life with.

Phil snorted. "Clint, you know who you are. You know who you've fought tooth and nail to become. That kid is going to be lucky to have you and Natasha as parents. And even luckier to have the Avengers as their aunts and uncles."

Clint smiled faintly. "And lucky to have you as a grandfather."

"Let's make Fury the grandfather," Phil corrected with a nudge to the archer's ribs. Clint chuckled softly. "You're going to be a great father, Clint Barton."

"You think so?"

"Oh, yeah," Phil grinned. "And don't forget. You've also got one hell of a support system. Not just the Avengers but also SHIELD."

Clint exhaled slowly and felt the tension clinging to him fade away slowly. Phil was right. Even if he had doubts about his parenting skills, the fact remained that he a lot of people that would be there to help him along the way. He learned to trust and depend on his friends… his family, throughout the years. He could do this.

"Thanks, Phil."

"You really want to thank me? Then stop asking to meet me by my grave. I swear I'm going to have this thing torn down."

"No!" Clint wailed with fake dramatics while clinging to the headstone. Phil laughed despite himself and Clint felt the rest of the tension fade away. He was going to do this. He and Natasha were going to have a baby.

This was going to either be the most amazing experience of his life or the thing that finally killed him. Or a weird combination of both.

* * *

*The end. Or maybe not. I might continue on with this one but for right I'm slapping a complete label on it. I've got six stories that I'm currently working on and I keep getting ideas for new ones. Looking at this one. I hope that you enjoyed at least.


	2. That Would Be Enough

**Summary:** Wherein Clint gets the Spanish flu, Natasha learns that antibiotics and birth control really don't mix, Bruce is over this crap already and Thor is a secret Mario Kart master. AKA the obligatory Avengers baby fic that I apparently really needed to write.

**Pairings:** Clintasha and background Peppernony

**Warnings:** Just general spoilers for the movie and _Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D_, though not current spoilers because this pretty much ignores anything after winter finale of season two as well as brings back Trip. Because he's still alive in my mind, dammit. Also a warning for pregnant stereotypes and abuse of perfectly good marshmallows.

**Disclaimer:** If I owned anything having to with the _Avengers_ I would be a rich, happy woman. Instead I am a broke, happy woman. I also do not own FRIENDS or anything related to that. But I did borrow a gag from that show. Sorry not sorry!

**Author's Note:** Whoa. I'm updating a story I wrote two years ago. Weird. But also I was craving fluffy happy times. So I wrote this ball of mush. Like I said, I plan on adding to this story whenever the muse hits me. So expect that there will be more baby shenanigans in the future. Hope you enjoy!

* * *

**That Would Be Enough **

Natasha woke slowly to the very odd sensation of familiar hands touching her in a previously unfamiliar area. A smile curved her lips as she felt calloused fingertips brush against the slightly swollen mound of her stomach. There was a fluttering of movement wherever those fingers touched almost as if in response. She didn't need to look to know there was a smile on his face, one of awed wonder. She'd seen it ever since the first kick a few days ago and she fell a little more in love with the man every single time. There were many changes in the months following the revelation that she was pregnant. But of all the changes in their lives, it was this deviation in their nightly routine that she loved the most. This was the time when they both let down their guards. When they stopped being the Black Widow and Hawkeye (or Ronin or whatever name he was calling himself these days) and were just Natasha Romanoff and Clint Barton. Natasha shifted so that her hand was resting on the soft head of hair that was lying across her chest. Her fingers carded gently through Clint's hair as he continued to trace idle patterns on her bare stomach. Her skin tingled wherever he touched. That was another pleasant side effect of her pregnancy. Almost every interaction they had excited her that much more.

"Do you think she's going to like me?" he asked, breaking the silence in the room.

"She?" Natasha asked, raising an eyebrow despite the fact that he can't see her. "It's a bit early for us to find out the gender."

"I just have a feeling she's a girl," he murmured. "A girl with your hair, my eyes and both of our brains. We're going to have to live up to our badass ninja reputations when she starts walking." Natasha snorted. Though she had to admit a girl with their looks and even a fraction of either of their intelligence would be quite dangerous once she started walking, even more so when she hit puberty. Natasha narrowed her eyes at the thought. Clint tapped her gently on the stomach feeling as if he could sense her mind drifting. He probably could. "But back to my original question… do you think she's going to like me?"

"If one of us is going to have doubts about whether this kid is going to like them, it should be me," she pointed out. "You're going to be amazing. Phil's nieces and nephews love you. You actually love them back. I look at them and have no idea what to do with them."

"You think I have any clue what I'm doing? The only kids I knew were in the group home and I left there by the time I was eight. The only reason the Coulson clan kids love me is because I slip them cookies when their parents and Phil aren't looking. I can't do that with our baby, Nat. I'm pretty sure we have to feed her healthy stuff. Then again, I actually have no idea what a father is supposed to do. I didn't have the greatest example of that."

Natasha sighed. She could point out that she was similarly at a loss as to how parents were supposed to be but she figured that wouldn't do anything to quell his fear of screwing their child up irrevocably. She knew this was going to be a cycle with them. They were damaged assassins. What the hell did they know about being parents? Neither of them had what could pass as functional childhoods. A lot of this kid's life was going to be trial and error. She accepted that fact as reality and moved on. But it seemed like the doubts lingered with Clint. It almost always did with him. A smile curved her lips upward as she thought about something.

"That's not true, you know? That you don't know what a father is like. You actually have an amazing example of what makes a father." She felt him shift with a protest on his lips. She pushed her hand down firmly, keeping him in place. "A father is the type of guy that will stay up all night and day with his kid when they're sick or hurting. Or even if they're having nightmares or guilt trips about the things that they can't control. A father will threaten hospital staff at gunpoint with little to no concern about how insane that makes him look in order to get access to his injured and medic phobic kid. A father will support his kid when he makes questionable life choices like recruiting the target they were supposed to kill. A father will know that it's a stupid move but back his kid up regardless of his feelings. A father will threaten said newly recruited former target with enough conviction to make it threat believable."

She felt Clint's smile against her stomach. "I guess maybe I did have a pretty good example after all." He turned his head so that he could face her. "You really think I can do this? You really want to do this with me?"

"Clint, we're both completely over our heads in this one. It is almost a guarantee that we're going to screw up in some way, shape or form. But I do know that this kid is incredibly lucky to have us as parents."

"Oh?" Clint asked with another slight smile. "And why is that?"

"Because when we fail, there are so many people that will be there to have our backs and help us make it better. In case you haven't been paying attention, dear partner, we currently live with four idiots that are campaigning to be named as godfather. It's only because he's been away that James isn't acting out with the rest of them. Same with Sam and Scott. And let's not forget about those twins of yours. I'm sure once they're all back full time, we're going to have even more overprotective weirdoes making sure we don't screw this up too badly."

"That's going to change in the morning," he murmured. "We're going to have to tell the rest of the Avengers and SHIELD."

"I can already hear the high pitched squealing. Do I need to be there?" Natasha groaned.

"It's kind of a big piece of the whole 'Nat and I are having a baby' announcement," Clint pointed out. She rolled her eyes. He sat up in bed and shifted so that she was now resting in his arms. His hands, as usual, were ghosting over her stomach.

"Baby isn't even here yet, and it already has you wrapped around their fingers."

"I never thought I could love someone even remotely as much as I love you but now… I love something I've barely even seen. I mean she's still avocado size."

"I'm going to really need you to stop reading all those stages of pregnancy sites," Natasha laughed. Clint echoed her laugh, his smiling shining through the darkness in their room. She lifted her hand to rest against his cheek. "I don't tell you this enough, but I love you."

"I know, Nat. I've always known."

"I know, but I need to say it to you more. Because you deserve to hear it. I love you, Clint Barton. And I love this baby, whether it's a girl or boy."

"I love you too. And she's a girl," Clint insisted, leaning down to kiss her softly. She smiled against his lips and wrapped her arms around neck pulling him even closer. "Seriously? Again? You're insatiable, woman."

She arched an eyebrow. "You were the one who promised to follow up on all my cravings and promised no judgment. Is that judgment I hear, Barton?"

"Never," he smirked, stretching out so that his full weight was pressing her against the mattress. Her legs lifted to cradle his hips. "I just want to know that you love me for me, Natasha Romanoff. And not just for how I make you feel. I don't want you objectifying me just because I'm a hot sex machine."

Natasha giggled. "This is your partly your fault. You're fifty percent responsible for me being a hormonal mess whenever you're around these days."

"Bullshit, you were always a hormonal mess when I was around," he whispered, peppering her neck with kisses. She tilted her head, giving him better access.

"Clint?"

"Yeah?"

"If you don't stop teasing me and just give me what I want, I'm swear I'm going to set your arrow collection on fire, starting with the boomerang arrows."

Clint snorted but promptly shut up. There were no more words that night.

* * *

The meeting with the rest of the Avengers (i.e. the ones not smart enough to avoid living in the Tower full time) went rather well. Sam claimed that he knew right away. Natasha didn't doubt that. The burrito belly cover story that Clint and Tony used worked only so many times. Scott immediately offered himself up as an advice source. Clint immediately accepted the offer as Scott was the only Avenger, so far, to successfully raise a human child. Not to mention, Clint was still convinced they were having a girl. Wanda offered to babysit. Natasha was on the fence about that one. Wanda alone was fine. But Wanda was hardly ever alone. She was always with her android boyfriend and/or her hyperactive spastic twin. She would have to think about that one. Still she smiled and thanked the younger woman before prying her partner away from his ongoing bickering with Pietro. The way they argued made it seem like they hated each other, but Natasha knew that Clint and Pietro were close. The archer had adopted the speedster as a little brother/son from the moment they met and she knew that she had Pietro acting out to look forward to in the next few months.

The next to be informed was one James 'Bucky' Buchanan Barnes. James was as predicted totally excited and more than a little pissed that no one told him that Natasha was pregnant. The fact that he was on a heavily classified, radio silent mission for the past three months just seemed to escape his attention. But at any rate, he was already head over heels in love with his niece (didn't take long for Clint to convince him the baby was a girl). As he was the closest thing Natasha had to family and also sniper bros with Clint, he was officially in the running for favorite uncle. Thor and Bruce conceded that he had an unfair advantage and were content to let him have the place. Tony, of course, was not but was smart enough to keep all griping to himself. It wouldn't do well to piss off the six foot something former HYDRA assassin that just returned from a four month long mission. Well, it wouldn't do well unless you were a six foot something genetically enhanced super soldier who kind of had some weird codependent life partners thing going on with before mentioned former HYRDA assassin. She wasn't touching their not exactly platonic relationship with a ten foot pole. She was also not going to get in the middle of their "discussion" about which of them would be the better uncle. They were born ridiculous and seventy years seemingly wasn't going to change that at all. So she and Clint left them to their nonsense and headed to the rest of the Clintasha Baby Tour… and no, she was not going to start calling it that, dammit!

Overall, the announcement to the rest of the Avengers went well. She really hadn't foreseen any problems because they were never her true concern. The biggest challenge was going to be telling the rest of their family in SHIELD. That part Natasha could deal without but she wasn't going to let Clint do it alone. She probably could but… she definitely didn't want to raise this baby alone. And leaving him to face the slightly insane people that worked for SHIELD alone would not end well for him.

It was widely accepted by mostly everyone who actually knew them that Phil was the closest thing to a father Clint would ever have. They were a tight family unit before Natasha came on board and then they just got better. When Phil died, it was almost the end of Clint. But the Avengers swooped in and claimed him as their own. They were the brothers Barney never was in the beginning and could only hope to be now. Then Phil came back and brought along more family for Clint (and Natasha by proxy). Phil's affinity for collecting strays and orphans brought along Fitzsimmons, Skye Daisy, Trip, Mack and Lance Hunter. Natasha would rip Clint's arms off and beat him to death with them if he ever claimed Bobbi Morse as family. And no, she wasn't jealous of Mockingbird or anything like that. She just didn't like the blonde hussy or want her anywhere near her…uh, Clint. Yeah, Natasha just didn't want her anywhere near her Clint.

But it couldn't be helped as she sat on a sofa watching as said blonde hussy and the rest of the motley crew she and Clint called family trickled into the room. Phil wanted to tell them all before he spread the news to the rest of the recently fully restored agency. And so Natasha sat with a pillow on her lap waiting for the team to finally assemble in the room.

"Now I know that you're probably wondering why I wanted you all here," Phil started once Mack was able to drag Fitz and Simmons out of their shared lab. "And you're probably also wondering why Natasha and Clint are here."

"They're not joining the agency full time are they?" Bobbi asked with a hint of a frown. Natasha and Clint both glared. She stared back, her features smoothing out into one of mock innocence. "Not that they aren't both delightful in their own ways of course. But I think we all agree they're better off as Avengers."

"Permission to stab her, sir?" Natasha asked Phil, never taking her eyes off Bobbi.

Phil sighed pinching the bridge of his nose. He threw an exasperated glare at May, who simply shook her head in response. Natasha snorted. When was Phil ever going to learn that May was never getting involved in the various squabbles and fights to the near death that followed the makeshift SHIELD family? Finally, he sighed and started to address them when he realized that someone was missing.

"Where's Trip? He was right there."

Daisy glanced around the room as if just realizing that her partner-in-crime was no longer sitting beside her. She closed her eyes seemingly in thought and then grinned. "He's still here. He's just," she twirled a finger in the air beside her. Natasha could see the faint vibrations with every movement. They heard a grunt that was distinctly Trip before the man himself was sitting on the sofa once again. Daisy elbowed him in the side. "Stop going all misty to avoid drama."

Trip smiled and shrugged. "You're only saying that because you have never seen Natasha and Bobbi actually go at it. It's enough to make even the bravest of people head for the hills. I swear three new recruits quit the day Bobbi served Clint with the divorce papers."

Natasha glanced over at Clint and found the idiot was grinning, as she expected. "That was a surprisingly not awful day."

"It was," Lance agreed. Mack elbowed him in the ribs once he realized that Bobbi and Natasha were not amused. "Why the hell does Barton always get away with making comments like that but not me? I married the woman too. I should get something for my pain and suffering."

"Oh, you're going to get some pain and suffering," Bobbi muttered under her breath. "So what do you two want anyway?"

Natasha huffed. This was getting annoying. She should've told Phil to keep Bobbi out of this for now. It wasn't that she hated the other woman. She actually respected her a lot as an agent. It was just that… there would always be a Clint sized rift between them. Natasha would always remember Bobbi as the woman that broke Clint's heart when she ended the, albeit, brief marriage with no explanation other than to throw blame on Natasha. Bobbi would always think of Natasha as the one that broke up their marriage when it was a well-established fact that nothing happen between Natasha and Clint until after they were both Avengers and long after Bobbi and Clint were divorced.

Whatever Bobbi saw between them was in her own head. If Clint loved her the way Bobbi thought she did back then, Natasha wouldn't have had to deal with the bordering on suicidal mess that the divorce made of her partner. Clint was even more reckless than usual after Bobbi filed for divorce. It was to the point where Natasha seriously feared she was going to lose her idiot partner. It took several months watching a hammer in the desert and the fallout from all that to finally snap Clint out of his funk. For that, Natasha would always resent Bobbi.

"Well, we wanted, uh, the thing is that we thought we should, you know tell you all, kind of before we told everyone else… that…."

"I'm pregnant," Natasha interrupted Clint's nervous rambling, throwing the pillow to the side and revealing the small yet very obvious baby bump.

There were several gasps of surprise and then suddenly she was bombarded by a squealing Jemma and Daisy. The two women were speaking something that resembled English but was at a pitch so high Natasha was certain only dogs could understand it. Mack, Fitz and Hunter were standing on the sidelines watching in amusement. Phil had his arm slung around Clint's shoulders as May and Trip teased him good naturedly about his potential parenting skills. The only one left out was Bobbi. And she was….

"Where's Bobbi?" Natasha asked, drawing the attention of everyone in the room.

"Trip, did you make her go misty?" Daisy asked with narrowed eyes. Trip rolled his eyes.

"First, that's not how this thing works. Second, I thought we all agreed that I am not going to be called the Mist nor were we going to refer to my abilities as misting! You get to be Quake and I have to be the Mist? How is that fair?"

"Terragenesis made you kind of bitchy," Daisy frowned.

"I'm pretty sure it was the lingering in a non-corporeal state for five months while everyone thought he was dead until a certain Quake vibrated him back together again that made him bitchy," Hunter drawled, earning a dark glare from Trip. He grinned. "Seriously though, where did Bobbi go?"

Natasha shrugged, not really concerned. Well, she wasn't until she caught the pensive look on Clint's face. As the others started discussing where the blonde could've gone, Clint rose to his feet and slipped away. Natasha glanced around the room not even surprised to see that his absence had also gone unnoticed. This was ridiculous. It was a room full of spies and none of them paid any attention. Well, that wasn't entirely true. She met May's gaze and wasn't shocked to see that she was well aware of Clint and Bobbi both leaving. She tipped her head in the direction Clint disappeared in and Natasha nodded.

She didn't have to go far. She found the former couple sitting on the floor outside one of the conference rooms. Bobbi's long legs were drawn up to her chest, her head resting on her raised knees. Clint was sitting close but a respectful (Natasha approved) distance from his ex-wife. His head was tilted to the side as he waited for Bobbi to acknowledge his presence. But the blonde didn't seem to be in a talking mood. Clint shrugged in his usual way and leaned back to rest against the wall. He pulled out his phone, contenting himself with texting. Judging from the faint buzzing in her pocket, he was on the group chat with the other Avengers. Part of her wanted to look and see. But the other part needed to see this. She trusted Clint… but still... she just needed to see what would happen.

"You ready to talk yet?" Clint asked, breaking the quiet that settled over the hallway. Bobbi lifted her head. "I don't get why you're upset."

"You really don't?"

"You left me, Bobbi. Not the other way around. You married Hunter barely six months after our divorce was finalized. But you're pissed at me because Natasha and I started dating a year after that?"

"I'm not pissed at you."

"Bullshit. I know what you look like when you're angry."

"I didn't say I wasn't angry. I'm just not angry at you."

"You mad at Nat?" Clint asked, and she could hear the protective edge in his voice. It made her heart flutter. Stupid hormones.

"No, I'm not even mad at her," Bobbi chuckled dryly. "No, I'm mad at myself. Because I convinced myself I didn't want this. I convinced myself that I was not cut out to be mother material. That there was no way to balance being a mother and being a SHIELD agent. And I wanted to be a SHIELD agent more than…"

"More than you wanted to be with me," Clint finished. Natasha clenched her fist as she fought the urge to yell at Bobbi. Nearly four years later and she still managed to find a way to hurt him.

"No," Bobbi said, surprising both partners. "Well yes, but not exactly like that. Clint, I was so happy when we were together. But I just never saw how we were supposed to work in the long-term. Did I ever tell you that I thought I was pregnant?"

"No…. when was that?"

"Actually a few months before the divorce."

Clint let out a shaky breath. "Is that why….?"

"Yes," Bobbi answered, voice also trembling. "I thought I was pregnant and I freaked out. All I could see was me being trapped. I was going to be stuck being a mother to a kid that I didn't want. I was going to have to give up my career at SHIELD. And I was damn excited when I found out that I wasn't pregnant. And I knew then that I had to get away. I had to end what we had before I ended up in another situation like that. Because if there was any man that I could see myself giving up my SHIELD career for, it would've been you."

"I would never ask you to do that."

"I know. Well, I know that now. Because I doubt Natasha has any intention of giving up being an Avenger."

"Definitely not," Clint answered, a fond smile heard in his voice. "It's going to be rough but there's no reason why we can't be parents and Avengers and part time SHIELD agents. It's not like we're lacking for ready and available babysitters at any rate."

"And that's why I'm mad at myself," Bobbi sighed. "Because I forgot that I wasn't in this by myself. I forgot that there is no one better to have in my corner than you."

"Maybe," Clint mused. "But we changed, Mockingbird. We're not the same as we were back then. I'm not going to lie. The whole divorce thing sucked. A lot. But looking back, I'm happy it ended then. Because the truth is, maybe I was in love with Nat back then. Maybe I was just too loyal to see what it really was. That's not a good marriage. That's not fair to you. You deserved better."

"I guess," Bobbi nodded.

"Besides, I'm pretty sure it's not too late. You know, if you wanted to balance the whole family and SHIELD thing."

"Wait, what?"

Natasha rolled her eyes as her usually quick partner finally got a clue. "No! God no. No, that ship between us has sailed. No, I meant you and Hunter. You know Daisy and Trip keep me informed of all the gossip here."

"That's embarrassing. You're using the Inhumans to spy on us?"

"Actually Phil is using the Inhumans to spy on you. I'm just reaping the benefits," Clint laughed before yelping as Bobbi hit him. "Seriously though, Morse. Pull your head out of your ass, will you? Hunter is head over heels for you still. And you put that man through more hell than me. And that's saying something."

"I," Bobbi paused. "I still care about him. But I don't want to hurt him again."

"Then my suggestion is to talk to him. Don't let things go all unspoken. People get the wrong ideas. Especially when your ex-wife/current girlfriend storms off after her ex-husband announces he's having a baby with his partner."

Bobbi groaned. "You think he noticed?"

"Definitely," Clint retorted. "Pretty sure he just didn't know which way to go so he waited until Nat followed us out here."

Natasha arched an eyebrow, whirling around to see a very sheepish Hunter hovering in one of the open doorways a few feet away from her. He shrugged.

"How long do you think he knew we were here?"

"He's known since I got here," Natasha smiled fondly at her partner, meeting his gaze. He held up a hand, beckoning her to come close. She wasn't in the habit of refusing him, so she stepped away from her listening spot to cross the distance between them. She sat down on his other side. He immediately linked their hands together. She actually didn't mind as much. She squeezed his hand even as Hunter came to sit next to Bobbi.

Bobbi spared one baleful look for their joined hands before concentrating on Hunter. The man was looking anywhere but at his former wife/current girlfriend. She gave him a soft look. One she never used to give Clint.

"Can we talk? Later?" she asked, a bit hesitantly. Hunter tore his gaze from the wall he was staring at to look in her direction. Natasha watched as his hardened expression melted slightly. He nodded.

"Yeah, I think that might be nice."

"Great," Bobbi smiled brightly. She then turned to Natasha. "Seriously, Natasha, congratulations. I know you two are going to be great parents."

"Thanks," Natasha murmured. She felt Clint elbow her. She glared at him. "Really, Morse. Thanks. It means… a lot."

Bobbi rolled her eyes before collecting her second husband and dragging him away to talk or make out. Whatever. Natasha was past caring. She felt Clint's elbow hit a rib again.

"What?! I was civil."

"Barely," Clint muttered. "She's trying, Nat. can't you try too?"

She huffed. "Fine. I guess I can try and get along with her." She grinned. "But she's definitely on the short list of people who can't babysit for us. She'll probably pull a hand that rocks the cradle bit on us."

Clint snorted. "You're twisted, babe."

"You love it," she whispered, leaning forward to press a kiss on his lips. But before she did, she bit on his bottom lip. "And don't call me babe."

She felt his smile against her own. "Don't lie. You love it too," he murmured. "Babe."

"You two are gross," Phil said, clearing his throat loudly. The two assassins looked up in unison at their former handler and always friend. "Any reason you're still lurking around?"

"Yeah, actually," Clint said, rising to his feet and pulling Natasha with him. "We wanted to know if you wanted to go to tomorrow's sonogram appointment with us."

"And by us, he means the entirety of the Avengers," Natasha corrected. "So you in? Ready to see Clint cry when he realizes the baby isn't a girl?"

"You really want me there?" Phil asked, looking genuinely touched.

"Of course," Clint replied with rare sincerity in his voice. Of course that was immediately ruined when that too familiar smirk formed less than a second later. "I mean you are the grandfather and all."

Natasha carefully extracted herself from Clint's embrace even as Phil started reaching for the Taser. She placed a careful hand on her stomach as if shielding the baby from what would likely be a painful reminder for Clint not to mess with Phil. She shook her head, ignoring Clint's yelps and pleas for help.

"Seriously, my little spider monkey, don't be like your father. Also don't be a girl. I can't stand it when your father is right. He's so smug about it. Of course, he's almost always right. But please let him be wrong just this once."

* * *

Clint wasn't wrong.


End file.
